Dating rules calling women
This was called “coming out” and was an indication that a young woman was interested in finding potential suitors.
During Victorian era, a couple which dated would normally get married.
Several books were published explaining the rules of etiquette to both genders.
Here are names of some of those: Godey’s Lady Book, Mrs. Humphry, The Laws of Etiquette: or, short rules and reflections for conduct in society, by a gentleman, and Manners and Social Usages.
Hill, there were four items she could accept from a gentleman while still maintaining propriety.
“Gentlemen do not care for the pretty trifles and decorations that delight ladies; and as for real necessities, they are apt to go and buy anything that is a convenience just as soon as it is discovered.” However, as a general rule, smoking caps, sleeping caps, and house slippers were popular gifts for gentlemen relations, as were handkerchiefs and tobacco pouches.
Step 2 – engagement After the couple had developed mutual affection, the next step to strengthen their relation was marriage. After getting engaged, the couple could get hold hands in public, go for walks alone, and take unchaperoned rides.
The Victorian girls, from the very beginning, were well trained and groomed to become the perfect wives and mothers.
Thus, some or the other kind of supervision was ensured when the couples were meeting.
A woman was never allowed to go out at night with a gentleman. Even if the girl entered the stage of courtship, she could never walk with the gentleman. Women were restrained to ride alone in the closed carriage with a man, expect for a close relative. The girl should not be invited by any gentleman at his place. If engaged, the gentleman could not turn back to see any other girl. Even after an engagement, the couple was not allowed to have sexual behavior. In the relationship, intelligence was not at all required, neither any interest in the politics.
There were many rules in respect of dating which were to be complied with. A single woman never addressed a gentleman without an introduction. No impure conversations were held in front of single women. A woman could not receive a man at home if she was alone. Step 1 – courtship The Victorian people were very cautious about courtships.
Another family member had to be present in the room. There was no physical contact between the woman and the gentleman until marriage. Victorian etiquette for men courting dictated that a man could offer the girl his hand if the road was uneven. She could flirt with her fan, as this behavior was within the protocol of accepted behavior. An unmarried girl would never date a man at the night. The dating would firstly begin when the couple would speak to one another.The men while dating a woman were discreet to never break an engagement as it tarnished the woman’s reputation.